like i said in my post earlier today the Holy Spirit spoke to me last night. it makes me laugh when God gives me a little thump on the head and says... try and keep up amanda. :)
before i was saved i would usually hook my ear plugs up to my mp3 player and listen to some music before i fell asleep. you see, i am a total music nut. i love it, love it, love it! i would have it playing ten hours a day when i was at home if i could. so i was laying in bed last night, in silence, wondering why i miss my music... but at the same time not having the urge to plug myself up to listen. and all of a sudden i got that little God thump and i just started to laugh and laugh...
over the past few days i have been rereading the emails that i sent david so that i could edit them just a little bit before i posted them. i must have read this one ten times since thursday, and it never hit me that my own words were answering my question. take a second to read it and see if you can figure out what i missed for two weeks. two paragraphs away from each other... and i missed it!
i knew very quickly after i was saved that God wanted me to stop listening to secular music. well, maybe not stop, but i know He at least wanted me to cut back my doses of it. i yielded to His will and put the mp3 player down... BUT i did it begrudgingly and i kept wondering why i missed it.
that night in the kitchen God must have had enough of me asking Him why... because while i was cleaning up He said... enough already! you miss the music that you worshiped so much? listen to the music I can make you hear for the next 30 seconds.... i will never forget standing in the kitchen that night, being moved to tears over what i was hearing in those everyday noises. now i know it was the Holy Spirit speaking to me in my own language... music.
now thats some pretty powerful stuff right there.
it took me two weeks to understand what God was trying to tell me that night in the kitchen. but after that thump last night i realized that i DID used to worship music. it was the altar that i bowed down to, and from the second i was saved He was telling me that i needed to back away from it because He knew that it was pulling (or was going to pull) me away from Him. He was telling me to turn down the volume so that i could hear Him.
i dont think that God wants me to completely stop listening to secular music, (though i know some might disagree) but deep in my heart i really think what He is trying to do is make me realize that He knows what is what is best for me. it was His will that i had the urge to turn off the music.... and now that i know what that feels like, i know i will be more ready to obey without questioning the next time i feel His will on my heart .
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